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Santa Claus

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  1. driving down the wrong side of the highway at 120 mph and explaining to my terrified passengers that i’m doing a modoki event
  2. have you considered that it is good to be boiled alive
  3. “my stomach shows a shrinking trend” i explain to my doctor who is mildly concerned that i brought a sack of hamburgers to my appointment
  4. not sure they’re gonna fall apart just yet, lot of distant lightning
  5. maximizing surface heating ahead of the forcing
  6. sun feels dimmer when it’s not diffusing through layers of haze
  7. depends on the weather but they’re a solid choice
  8. you need to be in a secure facility
  9. imagining the managing director of a multibillion dollar catastrophe bond fund at a reinsurance house making trades based on the weather station at scumhill road in chester county pennsylvania
  10. the people who make this shit are on the naughty list big time
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